There have been times in recent years that we have considered moving back to the west coast, where we would be closer to family and friends. Living in Connecticut, we sometimes feel that we in the middle of nowhere when it comes to being able to connect with family back home. There was a time that I didn't care about that so much, but as I grow older, I have this desire to reconnect with them. And from my experience last summer in Idaho at our wedding reception, it was clear to me that, although many in my family "don't condone" our relationship, they wanted to be there to support us. When you think about it, that's a rather bizarre and illogical position to take. Perhaps they are trying to reconcile their belief from their emotion?
So, in light of feeling somewhat isolated at times, we have, over the years, thought about relocating to the west coast. But where to live? For us to move somewhere that would dissolve our marriage is not acceptable to us. The price is too high for human dignity, legal protections, health care provisions, job protection, and all the rest. And just last week, Kent received a notice of a position offered at the University of Idaho, in Moscow, Idaho, that he would most likely have received if he had any inclination of applying for. He showed me the position, and we both immediately dismissed it out of hand. And this is why...
BOISE – Efforts to prohibit employment and housing discrimination against gay people in Idaho were rejected Friday by a state Senate committee as a shocked crowd of more than 250 supporters of the human rights bill looked on.
The committee, which includes all four members of the Senate GOP’s top leadership, refused to introduce the bill, thus barring a public hearing on it. ...
In Boise, state Senate Minority Leader Edgar Malepeai, D-Pocatello, told the Senate State Affairs Committee that his “Add The Words” bill would amend the Idaho Human Rights Act to ban discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.
“The act allows the commission to address issues in employment, housing, education and public accommodations. This legislation does not create a new protected class, since all people have a sexual orientation and gender identity,” he said.
Malepeai said, “It ensures that all Idahoans are free to hold jobs and rent apartments regardless of whether they are straight or gay. So the question before us today with this legislation is whether or not it is the policy of the state of Idaho to allow discrimination against our gay family members, co-workers and friends.” (source; photo credit, Associated Press)
The measure did not even get a hearing. The year is 2012, and Idaho is back in the 1970's on this issue of basic fairness. This bill simply said that you can't be fired for being gay, or denied a place to live for being gay. Really, was it too much to ask? The committee thought so, and this is the environment in Idaho.
The last time I was in Idaho, I went to Emmett to visit a boyhood friend. I would look at the nice new homes being built up in the hills overlooking the small town of Emmett where I grew up, and actually see myself living there, and actually being happy. I toyed with the idea of calling the realtor on the sign, assuming the realtor would sell to two guys. They probably would. They are sharks. And then, reality set in. We would work in Boise for sure, have separate health benefits, separate everything. And then of course, what kind of neighbors would we have? Most likely not very enlightened ones.
As far as moving to the west coast, it seems unlikely at this point. We talked about Vancouver in the past, and on Monday, it seems that Washington State will most likely pass marriage equality into law in their state. So now, Seattle is a possibility as well. Ironically, Rick Santorum will be in the state to use the opportunity to promote "traditional marriage".
The only thing that bothers me a bit about staying in Connecticut is the sense of isolation I sometimes feel, given the fact that we are getting to be in the older age group. I worry about being back here all alone, just the two of us. But if we moved back to Idaho, we would have family around, and Kent and I would be "legal strangers", in terms of all aspects of our relationship. We would be bachelors.
I think I will stick with my feeling of isolation. There certainly are worse things in life.